～かねる
cannot / find it hard to
～かねる attaches to the ます-stem of a verb and expresses that the speaker cannot do something, or finds it hard to do, for emotional, moral, or practical reasons. It maps to English “I am unable to ...” or “I find it hard to ...”.
Although the form looks affirmative, the meaning is negative. It's the mirror image of ～かねない, which looks negative but means “might well do”. The tone of ～かねる is soft and formal, so it is a staple of polite refusals in business and customer service.
1. Polite, formal refusal
In formal speech, ～かねます declines a request more gently than a plain negative like 答えられません. It suggests “circumstances do not allow me to” rather than a flat refusal.
その質問にはお答えしかねます。
“I am unable to answer that question.”
- その = that
- 質問（しつもん）= question
- には = marks the target of the answer, with topic は
- お答えしかねます（おこたえしかねます）= cannot answer (humble)
2. Hesitation or difficulty deciding
～かねる also describes being genuinely unable to bring yourself to do something, such as making a decision or a judgment.
メニューが多すぎて、どれにするか決めかねています。
“There are so many options on the menu that I can't decide which one to get.”
- メニュー = menu
- が = subject marker
- 多すぎて（おおすぎて）= too many, (and) so
- どれにするか = which one to choose
- 決めかねています（きめかねています）= am finding it hard to decide
How to form it
Verb ます-stem + かねる
- 答える（こたえる）= to answer → 答えかねる（こたえかねる）= cannot answer
- 決める（きめる）= to decide → 決めかねる（きめかねる）= find it hard to decide
- 賛成する（さんせいする）= to agree → 賛成しかねる（さんせいしかねる）= cannot agree
Key idea
～かねる is a polite way to say “I can't bring myself to do it” or “circumstances won't let me”. Remember the pair: かねる = cannot, かねない = might well, each means the opposite of what its form suggests.
Built on the same stem
Updated .